So…winter’s finally here and we’re of two minds. Some of us dance with joy at the thought of the wild white days ahead while others would rather just hibernate until the spring thaw. We’ve come up with suggestions for those on both sides of the fence:
If you love winter, consider these cold-weather celebration suggestions:
1. Add a blanket and leave your window open a crack at night. Fresh air and a cooler room will help you get a better sleep.
2. Treat yourself to really warm boots this year or get a pair of those battery-operated socks (Mark’s Work Wearhouse) to keep your feet cozy. Now make sure you go for a walk every day so you never get cabin fever.
3. Buy a super-soft scarf that you’ll love winding around your face.
4. Skip the coffee and tea and drink Ovaltine or hot chocolate at night – just like you did when you were a kid.
5. Buy a snowblower and do your neighbour’s sidewalks too – you’ll be a rock star. Expect to find cookies and banana bread brought to your doorstep in appreciation.
6. Treat yourself to one of those automatic car-starter things so you can get things warmed up while you’re still inside. Staying comfy in the cold weather is all about having the right gear.
7. Build a snowman, make a snow angel or toss a snowball or two – then duck!
If, on the other hand, you hate the whole chilly business, let’s skip the fake joy at that first snowflake thing and get real. Here’s our cold weather curmudgeon’s guide to surviving winter:
1. Never wear the proper clothing – you need something to grumble about every time you step outside. Try a windbreaker and your flip-flops.
2. Shovel only after you get a ticket from the city for letting your sidewalk become a snow bank. Swear as you dig yourself out and make sure you don’t accidentally clear even an inch of your neighbour’s sidewalk. This is Scrooge-style survival shoveling.
3. Don’t put snow tires on your car – they’re just a money grab invented by the Goodyear people. When you slip and slide and crash into someone’s parked car, try to find a way to blame it on them.
4. Never brush the snow off the top of your car. Instead, clear just the smallest patch possible on your windshield and go with that. If, as you zoom along the highway, the huge pile on your rooftop slides off and hits the car behind you, so what? They shouldn’t have been following you anyway.
5. Don’t slow down when you’re driving past a slush pile at the side of the road. Make it a game! How many pedestrians can you spray?
6. Keep your house so hot, the cat starts to melt and try not to breathe any fresh air until spring.